Sometimes I just need a good ass kicking

I took a much needed mini-weekend vacation with my son this past weekend. I needed some fun in the sun, and that’s exactly what I got. I was feeling inspired, filled up, and ready to conquer the world by the end of the weekend. Fast forward to Sunday night and I’m sitting in front of my computer looking at my calendar for the week. The excited giddy feeling I had from playing in the sun was gone. I suddenly felt overwhelmed.

Fast forward to Monday and the feeling grew worse. I was now struggling with feelings of anger and resentment. I have so many things I want to do. I have so many things I need to do. I’m looking at my schedule and there’s not much room to insert anymore. The worst is that I know there are things on my calendar that aren’t going to get done because I’m going to be too tired and consider them not a real priority. Give me a month and I’ll be buried in low priority tasks, angry at all of the things I didn’t do that I wanted to, and resentful towards the people that I’ve been helping or spending time with while not getting my own things done.

As much as I love spending time with friends and family or helping other out, I occasionally have to give myself a little ass kicking and remind myself that I need to take care of myself first (or in a month down the road I’m going to be worthless to everyone). So this week, I’m practicing saying no. My to-do list won’t just include things that have to be done right now. It will also include things I want to do. I will schedule in time to write, to paint, and to clean my house (this is the one I procrastinate on the most). Only after my own needs are met, I will start adding others into my schedule.

It isn’t fair to anyone else if I can’t say no and I end up resentful and angry. It’s not anyone else’s problem that my house is a mess, I still haven’t found the time or energy to unpack from my mini-vacation, and I feel overwhelmed from the amount of things I want to accomplish. I am responsible for myself. So after a good ass-kicking, I’ve already saying no this week. My priorities are becoming clearer, I’m feeling a little lighter, and I’m starting to feel like I might just conquer the world again.

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About strokeofred

I am from Kansas and I have traveled all over the world. I am an artist, and I have a business brain. I love skirts and tennis shoes. I like to get dirty and ride motorcycles. I am sensitive and I can be mean. I love nature, and believe in protecting it. I love to laugh, and feel better after a good cry. I can be stubborn and impatient. I am constantly growing. I am open and free. I look to be inspired and love to inspire. I play guitar and secretly want to play drums. I have a puppy that brings me great joy. I love hugs, cuddling, holding hands...and wrestling. I love the mountains and the beach. I have to make a pilgrimage to the ocean at least twice a year to balance myself. I believe in balance in all things. Traveling is a passion, and meeting interesting people from all over the world is the perk! I have small town values, and big city dreams. I love beer, hate wine. I believe that what you put out comes back. I believe and live by the belief of treating others like you want to be treated. I enjoy stimulating conversation, and a good sense of humor. Caffeine is my drug of choice, and coffee over chess or good conversation is my luxury. I am strong but sometimes feel small. I strive to be my authentic me.
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